August 10th, 2012
by Sheree
A Different Kind of Miracle
It’s been a while since I’ve blogged but I have a good excuse. It’s because I’ve been feeling so good. All I’ve wanted to do is anything that gets me out of the house and makes me feel normal again. So sitting at home in front of my computer hasn’t been on the top of my priority list. There are however things that have been stirring inside me that I feel I must get out, so here I am.
If you’ve followed my journey over the past eight months you know about my intense battle with cancer. Now that I am on the other side of it and have had some time to reflect I realize that there are things I’ve learned that I must start sharing.
The first and biggest lesson I learned was on the definition of a miracle. I don’t mean the literal definition, but my own definition. You see, from the onset of my diagnosis I assumed God was going to show me something amazing through my battle. I was sure I would experience a miracle. The only problem was, my definition of a miracle and God’s were two different things. In my limited capacity of understanding I thought God was going to somehow miraculously spare me the pain and suffering that traditionally comes with chemo and radiation. He didn’t. In fact, every side effect they mentioned could happen did; and some they never mentioned happened as well.
Needless to say, it didn’t take long for me to get discouraged. Where was my God? Why wasn’t he coming to my rescue? What had I done to deserve this harsh treatment? Discouragement soon turned to despair as I waited in vain for the miracle that never came.
About the time my treatment ended I really began to seek God as I tried to make sense of it all. Why had He allowed me to suffer so much? As I pressed in to God I felt as if He whispered into my soul, “My Son suffered even more, He didn’t deserve it and he never complained”. It stopped me dead in my tracks. My whining immediately stopped too. How could I have expected better treatment than Jesus received? Why did I think I deserved a miraculous deliverance from pain and suffering when God’s own Son wasn’t spared?
Reflecting on this truth opened my eyes to see that Jesus’ suffering was for others which made me realize that perhaps my suffering was for others too. Once I took my eyes off of myself and started looking for the upside in my adversity I soon saw that there were great lessons that I could glean from my pain.
My change in perspective was a miracle, perhaps the miracle that I had been waiting for. While it didn’t look like I expected, it was far greater than I deserved. I am now a changed person with a new outlook on everything.
Below are the top 5 things I learned:
- What the enemy meant for harm, God intended for my good. If it sounds familiar it’s because it’s an adaptation of what Joseph said to his brothers twenty years after they sold him into slavery. Sometimes it takes us a while to see the good, but we serve a God who is always in control even when it doesn’t look like it.
- Don’t complain about your lot in life.The enemy can’t do anything to us that God hasn’t given him permission to do. That means when life is hard, God is allowing it for a reason. When we complain we are basically saying to God that His plan for our spiritual growth is wrong. Instead of complaining we should embrace it with the attitude to learn from it.
- Love is the most important thing. I’ve never experienced love like I did though my battle. It was incredible. But it exposed my own deficiencies in loving others. Through receiving love I learned how to give love and how truly important it is.
- Always check your motives. Somehow when God strips everything away from you, you begin to see that your motives weren’t always as pure as you thought. Having to completely step away from ministry for a couple of months helped me put things in proper perspective. It’s not about the numbers, but instead about each woman I have an opportunity to serve and love.
- Don’t let your tomorrow get in the way of your today. I’ve spent years pursuing the dream that God gave me, making the dream my goal and not enjoying where I am today. When you suddenly don’t know if you will make it to tomorrow you realize how important today is.
My challenge to you is to take another look at your life. What hard things have you gone through that are really miracles wrapped up in a different package than you expected?
God Bless!
Sheree
August 10, 2012 at 8:58 am, Carisa said:
I have been following your blog posts for a few months now and have really been impacted by your writings. They are so honest and truthful and real. Thank you for so much for sharing your heart and God’s love through your life. -Carisa
August 10, 2012 at 9:22 am, Gillian said:
I am reminded of that song by Laura Story – Blessings
What if your blessings come through raindrops what if your healing comes through tears. What if a thousands sleepless nights are what it takes to know you’re near. What if trials of this life are your mercies in disguise?
Sheree so grateful for your testimony and your strength through your very difficult battle. God bless you always.
Love,
Gillian
August 10, 2012 at 9:49 am, Amy Erickson said:
Sheree!! Thank you for loving us enough to share these wonderful lessons. I am so happy you are feeling stronger. Thank God we serve a God who is so incredibly patient with us. He has told us over and over and over again that ALL things work towards the good of those that serve Him…ALL things.
August 10, 2012 at 11:00 am, Mary said:
definitely food for thought
August 10, 2012 at 12:37 pm, Nancy Cherry said:
I am so grateful for your post today. It makes me reflect on what I have been going through with my chronic neck pain. I am by no means going through anything like you endured, but I have been feeling pretty sorry for myself. Seeing your post renewed me to know that God is putting a wrench in my life to get closer. I have had to take a leave of absence from a job I love and it has been very hard. But after two cervical epidurals, I am feeling much better and will be returning to work in a week on a much more limited schedule. But I am ok with it. Your post has reminded me of what I already knew. Thanks and I am so glad you are feeling “normal” again. You are an inspiration.
August 10, 2012 at 4:14 pm, Janie said:
Your post today was huge. I have my own religion and generally don’t care to listen to others go on and on about God blah blah blah. I know & love God and don’t feel the need to share as I consider this personal. Today I did read what you said and it all was so touching and heartfelt. I’m glad you took the time out of you wonderful life to express your thoughts. Each point was very important and I couldn’t pick one over the other. Ending with #5 was maybe the wrap up of all to make today so special. Thank you for sharing today.
August 10, 2012 at 6:12 pm, Sheree said:
Janie,
Thanks for taking the time to read my post and for sharing so honestly about where you are. As you can tell I am passionate about my faith and being real with my struggles. Hoping and praying that anything I say might help someone.
Sheree
August 10, 2012 at 5:33 pm, Renee Miller said:
Sheree is it soo good to hear that you are up and at it once again ((; Thank you for sharing your testimony and your “New Perspective.” You’re such an inspiration and I’m anxious to study these tidbits of truth.
Serving Him,
Renee
August 10, 2012 at 9:45 pm, Dee goar said:
Sheree you are a blessing. Thanks for sharing your journey and your wisdom. It is so good to see you returning to normal….a new richer normal.
Dee
August 10, 2012 at 10:36 pm, Lynn Mercer said:
After what you have endured, I think it is a miracle that you can say “Instead of complaining we should embrace it with the attitude to learn from it.” In the present moment is where we can meet God and experience His presence. “Always now, only now” as one of my favorite authors says. Love it!!!!!
August 10, 2012 at 10:38 pm, Lynn Mercer said:
Sorry. That last sentence was in reference to #5 which was my favorite one. So true!! So glad to hear your voice the other day.
August 12, 2012 at 2:53 pm, The Top 10 Leadership Posts I Read The Week Of August 6th | Brian Dodd On Leadership said:
[...] A Different Kind of Miracle by Sheree DeCouto. Sheree, our wonderful Spiritual Life Director at Fellowship Bible Church, provides the lessons God taught her after surviving an intense battle cancer. [...]